2 Corinthians 12:9-10

“But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”

…

For a long time, I carried the shame of my weakness. I held on to guilt and blame. I took every lie, every insult, every hardship… I took each one and locked it away. If I keep it in the dark, if I keep it buried, it can’t hurt me… or anyone else. But I was wrong.

…

I thought by burying my pain, I was showing strength.

I thought the hole I dug could hide it all.

But the more I buried, the deeper the hole had to be.

And eventually… the things I was trying to bury, buried me.

The hole I dug… was no longer a safe place to keep secrets… it was a grave.

And the secrets… built the coffin.

…

By the grace of God, that grave is empty.

By the grace of God, my grave became my glory.

…

The Devil tried to break me:

I was born to a father who abandoned me.

I was born into a world… full of pride and vanity.

I was taught to tell the truth… except when it’s messy.

I believed by being the best… I’d prove my worth in my abilities.

I wanted to be praised… so my pride whispered perfection.

I wanted love and attention… so much so, it blinded me to deception.

I wanted peace… so I was given religion.

I was taught that in order to get into heaven… my spot had to be bought and earned.

So when I refused to fall in line… I was doomed to burn.

I wanted a family and purpose… so I joined the military.

But when I needed them the most… I was given shame and solitary.

From inside that grave… my last breath whispered, “Help…”

The silence was deafening… until, finally, it broke.

“I hear you, my child… Let go of your yoke.”

When I finally let go… I was pulled up and out.

But something was different… I felt no shame… or doubt.

Where I was once filled with darkness… I now felt a burning flame.

God had filled my heart with faith… and I will never be the same.

…

I am grateful for my suffering. I am grateful for my mistakes. And I am grateful for every piece that created my grave… because each and every one… brought me closer to finding God.

…

The Devil tried to break me… but God writes my story.

Psalm 68:5-6

“A father of the fatherless, and a judge of the widows, is God in his holy habitation. God setteth the solitary in families: he bringeth out those which are bound with chains: but the rebellious dwell in a dry land.”

Psalm 139:1-16

“O Lord, you have searched me and known me! You know when I sit down and when I rise up; you discern my thoughts from afar. You search out my path and my lying down and are acquainted with all my ways. Even before a word is on my tongue, behold, O Lord, you know it altogether. You hem me in, behind and before, and lay your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is high; I cannot attain it. Where shall I go from your Spirit? Or where shall I flee from your presence? If I ascend to heaven, you are there! If I make my bed in Sheol, you are there! If I take the wings of the morning and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea, even there your hand shall lead me, and your right hand shall hold me. If I say, “Surely the darkness shall cover me, and the light about me be night,” even the darkness is not dark to you; the night is bright as the day, for darkness is as light with you. For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them.”

Matthew 11:25-30

“At that time Jesus declared, “I thank you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, that you have hidden these things from the wise and understanding and revealed them to little children; yes, Father, for such was your gracious will. All things have been handed over to me by my Father, and no one knows the Son except the Father, and no one knows the Father except the Son and anyone to whom the Son chooses to reveal him. Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.””

Romans 6

“What shall we say then? Are we to continue in sin that grace may abound? By no means! How can we who died to sin still live in it? Do you not know that all of us who have been baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? We were buried therefore with him by baptism into death, in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life. For if we have been united with him in a death like his, we shall certainly be united with him in a resurrection like his. We know that our old self was crucified with him in order that the body of sin might be brought to nothing, so that we would no longer be enslaved to sin. For one who has died has been set free from sin. Now if we have died with Christ, we believe that we will also live with him. We know that Christ, being raised from the dead, will never die again; death no longer has dominion over him. For the death he died he died to sin, once for all, but the life he lives he lives to God. So you also must consider yourselves dead to sin and alive to God in Christ Jesus. Let not sin therefore reign in your mortal body, to make you obey its passions. Do not present your members to sin as instruments for unrighteousness, but present yourselves to God as those who have been brought from death to life, and your members to God as instruments for righteousness. For sin will have no dominion over you, since you are not under law but under grace. What then? Are we to sin because we are not under law but under grace? By no means! Do you not know that if you present yourselves to anyone as obedient slaves, you are slaves of the one whom you obey, either of sin, which leads to death, or of obedience, which leads to righteousness? But thanks be to God, that you who were once slaves of sin have become obedient from the heart to the standard of teaching to which you were committed, and, having been set free from sin, have become slaves of righteousness. I am speaking in human terms, because of your natural limitations. For just as you once presented your members as slaves to impurity and to lawlessness leading to more lawlessness, so now present your members as slaves to righteousness leading to sanctification. For when you were slaves of sin, you were free in regard to righteousness. But what fruit were you getting at that time from the things of which you are now ashamed? For the end of those things is death. But now that you have been set free from sin and have become slaves of God, the fruit you get leads to sanctification and its end, eternal life. For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.”